of a damp basketball court.

Im sorry if you guys have been checking back here just to find that i havent updated..

I made a promise to myself to only blog after it had hit me that 2 of my friends are no longer in the same country as i am..

So,

Here i am writing this because i know that the next year will be a bit different … some things i cant say, some things i cant do and even if i can it wouldn’t feel the same.

After coming back today, i noticed a puddleful basketball court, the same basketball court that i first visited my first day at my new home.

The air was different and it wasnt the rain that stopped 20 minutes ago or the ball that was kinda lacked of air.. its just a moment of sheer poetry.. It was loss, new beginnings, friendship and even a hint of hunger.

My fingers talked with the ball and walked past the damp air and not until i took  a sit i just realised that i have been back to the start.

The start that i once wanted but until now never realised that i didnt actually like it.

I headed home and at least now something familiar would bolster me and it did.

fan arts post #1

Im back on the forum! felt so goood…

Since i’m on i thought that i should make some arts.. (first time doing)

So, after visiting the Tree Hill forum.. i thought i’d do some mia catalano/kate voegele arts..

So here they are.

but to me its normal.

- by ProudOfBeingStrange

A photograph to me, is more than a thousand words..

the expressions, the moment, the people.. nothing can emulate that.

I think i recognise people from pictures more than first impressions.. i feel that they always wear their hearts on their sleeves.. for real.

There is pictures of one person that i cant seem to get my mind around.. or sometimes think straight and as you might guess its a her..

Sometimes she takes the pictures, but it’s always seem to be very third party.

It seems that everytime i see her.. its a smile or maybe a giggle..

but never one that raises my eyebrow..

I know i may sound weird.. but to me its normal, being stricken by a photo, by a word or even by a surrounding

Theres one where she looks into the camera behind this small sensitive smile sits someone who is really thinking how would that moment look on the picture, concentrated yet released..

sigh ..

its hard to put into words ..

Its just something that you get.. in the moment.

one day and yesterday.

-*hansah

Maddie called and i was more than elated to see her number..

I miss hearing her voice though.. its been i think about 2 years since i’ve talked to her.. gosh i miss that girl..

It was a 2 hour call.. i didn’t know time could fly so fast… and i was worried she would like get a hell of a phone bill but apparently she was just trying out her VOIP phone.. lol

oh.. Maddie is a friend i had met a few years back when i was admin at a website..and she was like the only one there who know where malaysia was.. and was suprised i had internet access..

One thing led to another and i found myself one of the best girl friend a guy could ask for..

Nothing romantic.. just interesting.. secrets, jokes and thoughts were shared.. she was like my journal and i her notebook (a big one)

The best memory we had was a conversation one Christmas where we were discussing eggnog and how she got sick one Christmas.. it was hilarious..

so, to Maddie.. Happy Birthday again! i know its been like forever since i’ve sent you an email..but i guess this blog post would be one for the ages..

Miss you loads! and msg me before you call me will ya? lol

Til next time lil tomato.

in a gray place.

-by Arson06

I am somehow in a gray place..

My thoughts tonight have been about being a nice enough guy ..Have you ever been in a place where you wanna tell someone about someone else but don’t want to be a total ass..

It’s a gray place where it is no holds barred. pretty much ugly but in a real world context..

It’s worried me a lot and i have no idea what i should do or should i even do anything at all..

line crossing .. big no no.

- by salmasterz

there are some lines you do NOT cross, for everything else theres mastercard.

1 friend request.

-by .the very talented. rach2285.

Here’s to friends.

and to whom we find beauty in .. when we dont even try.

By now – you should know how much joy to my life, receiving a single friend request is..

to me, it is equivalent to having someone voting for you, be it an award; or an election.

It is to be wanted by someone else, to be privileged to be called someone’s “friend” .

to me, my friends make up who i am and what i live for day to day..

It is who made me get up at 6 am looking forward to the 18-odd hours of staying up,

Friends who i can study with in times of need .. friends who i can be the background of the picture.. a friend who i can be there for..

Save me from myself. Words i would always repeat as the question ” what are friends to you?” comes asking.

I dont want to be bias, or do not pride myself with forgetting some of my friend whom i never seen for some time..

That’s why sometimes actually most of the time i am the sore thumb.. the different one.. the extra wheel.. because i know or to be more frank .. i hope to be remembered..

and thats why more often than not.. i do not request for a friend unless i feel that you would be an impact in my life..

If you knew, I am still living in my memories.. the inside jokes are always the ones on my mind.. because it is closes in my heart.. i remember my high-school days like it was just hours ago..and I dont think i am capable of forgetting..

“Love depends on mood and friends rely on you” – Anonymous.

To what do we owe this battle that we call life?

It is to ourselves that me remain

But it is for friends that we fight to uphold

a moment that lives on in our mind.

questions.

this week.

innocent or experienced ?

secrets per se.

Your eyes speak word beyond my understanding

and your lips whisper my name

I am anything but worthy

for something so perfect

someone so lovely

Ill save you my Ophelia

From the waters that devours your heart

be your cloud when the sun reaches its high

and be next to you all through to morrows nigh

There was once, one type of secret

one that there is no point in keeping

its where we find each other

and get lost in the gaze just the same

for too many smiles i have rejected

and many words i have not been spoken

til the next time i promise that you will know

where the secrets are and no sorrow grow.

back to basics.

trunk and all.

-learning how to feel and think ..
-learning to not care again..
-learning to not know what i did not do..
-learning to be..
-learning to forget doubts..